“Do selfish right.” It’s okay to go to the beach for the weekend rather than volunteer at the homeless shelter. It’s okay if it balances your life, optimizes your energy, and helps you ultimately give more than you consume. Learn to embrace selfishness with an attitude of grace and compassion. Being a constantly self-sacrificing martyr will only burden your world. Take time to work out, to attend to your career, to spend quality time with those dear to you. Take time to clear your head and gain focus. Take care of your needs and you will benefit your world. – We’ve been working on a new website! Whenever we read these posts, we’re…
Webinar: Spiritual Awakening and Body Transformations
A spiritual awakening takes you towards what is most true, natural, and healthy for you, and that includes your body. If your body wants more weight on it, it'll add weight as you shift and grow. If it wants less, it'll lose weight. If it wants different kinds of food, it'll make that request be known–loudly and clearly. It can be surprisingly…
The Use of Symbols in Psychology
From cave paintings to modern day ’emoticons’, symbols have existed for thousands of years, and are a central part of our daily lives. We often use them in speech to create understanding with people who share our culture or experience. “My heart was like lead” gives a clear indication of sadness and regret. Other symbols …
The better you
“The most creative act you will ever undertake is the act of creating yourself.” – Deepak Chopra And re-creating yourself too. Goals are but mile markers on your life’s journey. They are feedback on how you’re proceeding in the process of becoming the better you. The person you create is the result of the systems you design and follow for your life. All the habits, disciplines, and processes you enable in the course of creating…
Time, Money, Productivity, and Life
Do you feel guilty when you’re not doing something productive? In this age of time management we can easily adopt the idea that if we are not focused on productivity then we are wasting time. So we try to get super organized in an effort to boost our productivity. We could claim our attempts to cram as much as possible into each day is based on the fact that life is short and we want to accomplish all we can. I’m sorry, but that argument just doesn’t hold water. Why? For one thing, it’s our natural tendency to seek …
How to De-energize Old Pain With Relaxation
I will start by simply saying that using relaxation to release issues is not a new idea. I'm not the only one who talks about it, and I've already talked about it in a number of different ways in past posts like these two:Dissolving Issues With AwarenessHow to Find and Release Physical Pain During a Spiritual AwakeningFurthermore, I want to be clear that having awakened spiritually is not a prerequisite to using your awareness to dissolve issues. Any one of you can do this.When we look at an issue or old pain with awareness, we are taking our energy away from it. We relax to make space for something to…
11 Tools For Building Confidence – Starting Today
It seems that in today’s modern world, confidence is a currency similar to money – we all want more of it, and it never seems enough. This is in part because of the self-help movement’s connection of confidence with success. (But this concept is actually a myth- more on that later.) It’s possible many of us actually …
Pay it!
“If you want success, figure out the price, then pay it.” – Scott Adams The difference between wishing and deciding matters. When you decide to succeed in a big way, you not only acknowledge the price, you’re willing to pay it. You either pay the fare or get on a different bus. – We’ve been working on a new website! Whenever we read these posts, we’re inspired to write our own private thoughts. Now you can write your own private thoughts at 130words.com. It’s easy. It’s private. It’s free. Try it! Let us know what you
Griselda Uglyheart….way way in denial…and – in my opinion – a horrible human being as well
I wrote this months ago and the lady in question, Griselda Uglyheart, has been writing me telling ME how wrong I am. She is way in denial and is taking her husband’s horrible behavior out on a CHILD. She wanted … Continue reading →
What really matters?
It’s easy to get lost on the treadmill of life, but it’s worth getting off to start living. He was on his cell phone. Driving and talking. Talking and driving. Driving and talking. Talking and … CRASH!!! She was in her hospital bed. Breathing and gasping. Gasping and breathing. Breathing and … you get the idea. Too bad his business had to come before her life. Is it just me, or does it seem we have lost more than a little perspective? Have we forgotten what really matters? We rush through our days trying to “accomplish” things. We stuff so much into our days that they burst at the seams. There is one thing we can’t…
Welcome to the facts of life
“A common misunderstanding about failure, similar to one we seem to have about death, is that if we don’t plan for it, it won’t happen.” – adapted from Seth Godin Get out from under the blanket. Quit hiding from reality, and living in denial. You are going to die and you are going to fail. Welcome to…
How to Program Yourself for an Amazing Relationship
Everybody wants a meaningful and lasting relationship. So, why does there seem to be such a scarcity of great relationships these days? Is there some way that we could be better prepared before we take a big relationship plunge? While every relationship has its own unique complexities, I believe that what we bring into a relationship emotionally is crucial to the success of that relationship. Too many people make a commitment to another person without being emotionally aligned with the reality of that commitment. They are still …
Another Splitting Post
I have written about 8-10 “splitting” posts. Here is one that was requested. I was in a long-term relationship that I’ve written about on here. We were in a 4 year relationship and it was a pretty nice relationship but … Continue reading →
Comparing Yourself to Others – Can It Ever Be Helpful?
From a parent telling us we have been better behaved than a sibling, to a teacher who keeps a chart with students’ names and gold stars, we are taught the idea of comparing from very young. In psychology, the human drive to compare ourselves to others is called “social comparison theory”. Social comparison theory The theory …
Toughen up
“Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face.” – Mike Tyson Just how adaptable are you? Circumstances can change in a heartbeat. What have you done to anticipate, or avoid, or adjust when chaos shows up? How will you react if the rug gets pulled out from underneath your nice tidy life, and you’re now flat on the floor? Will you get up, or just lie there waiting for the 10 count? A creative dose of positive, proactive paranoia can help. Knowing your alternatives and workable next steps – Plan B – is always a good idea. Think. Think ahead. Toughen up. Fine tune your resiliency. Learn to roll with the …
Being a Doormat Doesn’t Make You “Nice” or “Loving”; It Makes You Stupid
Based on comments, this needs a rerun. I have said over and over again that healthy boundaries are the key to good relationships. Yet I keep hearing people say “I’m a good person who was good to him or her … Continue reading →
Facing the Abyss of Self-Hatred
Self-hatred is one of the defining issues of our times. It is all over the place in Western society. It is speaks in millions of voices and is seen in thousands of different ways. It all speaks in the discordant, grating chorus that says, " You are not okay as you are." Or perhaps more truthfully, each individual is saying, "I am not okay as I…
What is Histrionic Personality Disorder?
A personality disorder is a consistent and long-term pattern of thinking, behaving, and relating that leaves someone unable to match or manage the norms of the culture they are in. Histrionic personality disorder (HPD) sees an individual living with an overwhelming need to constantly be the centre of attention, often using seductive and manipulative behaviour to achieve this. With their sense …
Get focused on those who matter
“The inhabitants of planet Kardashian are okay without you.” – Jeff Haden There are people who don’t make a difference in your life. Be nice, be positive, but resist their distracting presence. Focus on family, friends, and colleagues – the people who matter. Those who support, enable, and give to your life. And stay receptive to people around the edges. There are wonderful people surrounding you; people you should meet, or reconnect with in a new…
Webinar Recording: Embracing All of Your Emotions
Many people think that spirituality is a path that allows us to feel good all the time. This is not the human experience. It has never been the human experience, and I find it very difficult to foresee that it’ll ever be that way.Yet, many people are constantly trying to have only “positive” experiences and emotions, and this creates a tremendous shadow-side to their personality and ego. Anger, sadness, and fear get locked behind a door of false happiness and humility, and this creates tremendous inner pain as someone attempts to be happy or positive all the time.As many of you know, maturing on the spiritual path means embracing all of our emotions and experiences. It is also…
Only milestones…
“The journey is sometimes better than the destination.” – Robert Pirsig There is no final destination while you walk the earth – only milestones. You are a nomad. We are all nomads. After reaching the objective it’s time to start planning and preparing for the next journey, the next challenge. The point of arrival becomes the point of departure. Unless, of course, you wish to stand down, to stay static, and begin to decay. The next journey need not be limited to geography and location. For example, cosmologist Stephen Hawking cannot move his body, due to ALS, yet his mind travels constantly – to amazing and wondrous worlds. You’re either moving ahead or you’re falling behind. What’s on your roadmap? – We’ve been …
Webinar: Feeling Spiritually Lost and Finding Your Way
Many people feel spiritually lost at different times of their lives. In the context of a spiritual awakening, we often feel this way because a lot of our ego and the reference points we used to have dissolve. In this way, we stop having a clear direction about where to go.A lot of what the ego does is to tell us what to do to stay "safe." It is often quite wrong, and as we become more conscious and focused on the present moment, it is quite normal to feel lost. This is part of the sacred adjustment time where you realize that …